Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Silk..

i think about him, every now and then..and it makes me smile. this is one relationship where i can not think of anything i would have changed. not the way we met, nor the way we parted. it was magical,all of it, as if from a movie. not surprising, since this is how we met- at a movie theatre.i watch a lot of movies by myself, and so does he. several movies later, we found ourselves face to face, and ended up having midnight coffee, something which i, an insomniac, would never have done, unless hypnotized. the mood was set: endless journeys with Wong Kar Wai, Almodovar, Miyazaki, Baricco... and good wine.
it had to end though. we were from two different worlds, delightfully converging, creating, connecting. and all along the driving force was the certainty of diverging. no expectations, living in and for the moment.
i googled him today (actually, the train of thought went like this: "woww!!! Neil Gaiman has a blog! I'm totally bookmarking it-->he introduced me to Neil Gaiman--> where is he?"). he won a prize recently for his role in preserving the architectural heritage of Montreal,I was so happy for him. I wanted to congratulate him. so I decided to email him. I pasted his email address in the "To" section. and i froze. i had nothing to say. "hi, how are you?i googled you and-" no. "it's been a while, how have you been? i heard from my good friend Google that-" No!. for all i know he might be married with kids. and why would i allow myself to enter his life just like that out of the blues only because I woke up today and remembered him? No..it was more than that. I want to preserve the magic, I did not want it to get mixed up with real life chit chat. so I closed the message window, landed on earth, and googled " recipes for oil-based pasta sauces"..

19 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Forever the romantic...

1:00 PM  
Blogger Ghassan said...

I totally understand what you mean about preserving the magic! people in my life often become actors, and I sometimes stop myself short from telling them what to do or what to say (or 'how dare you change the script without consulting with me! I'm killing you in the next act!')... I wish we could all have our own theaters without conflict of interest.

1:00 PM  
Blogger J. said...

Very nice post Laila. Thanks for sharing...
Hey I go to the movies alone all the time and I've never met anyone there. Are there specific skills required?

1:03 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

as the people remain actors, we become more and more self-involved and content with fantasies. it's very unhealthy. laila, what do we have to lose in this life? ever?

1:30 PM  
Blogger Laila K said...

e-saw-m, i'm a realist generally,maybe that's why this was so magical for me.

gus, funny!

thanks jij! i never meet anyone either, he's the only exception..

mirvat, there's nothing unhealthy about preserving the magic..as long as we know what's real and what's not, what are we without our memories?

1:49 PM  
Blogger Ghassan said...

unhealthy what? you're improvising now; watch out! (singsong)
People, stick to the script! please please.
OK. let's try again.
e-saw-m: romantic.
Gus: bla bla a propos of nothing.
Jij: nice laila.
Mirvat: healthy Laila, healthy!
Laila: thanks. goomhoory el habeeb.
(curtain)
(applaud; bis)
Gus, Laila and Mirvat for curtain call.

3:04 PM  
Blogger rouba said...

google is a woman's best friend!

3:25 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

gus you're losing it!

3:49 PM  
Blogger BeeJ said...

T'is the season to be jolly

3:53 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

layla. like we said. i ment the opposite. it's unhealthy to grab on to memories to the point of being passive. call him. what do you have to lose?

4:01 PM  
Blogger Laila K said...

gus, that's hilarious!
rouba, it is! have you googled urself yet?
beej..welcome?
mirvat, don't want to. plus don't have his number anymore!

4:06 PM  
Blogger Zanzounito said...

come one! why not call him???...what's the WORST thing that could happen?...do it..do it...do it!!!!!!!!!

1:09 AM  
Blogger Paul said...

I would rather never live knowing there is an opportunity I have missed.
C'mon Leila (and not Laila; without any reference to the Rouba / Ruba dilemma) I would have definitely got in touch with him again (her for me, at least for now).
yes, he might have changed. He might be married with kids, he might have developed taste for men, I don’t know and you don’t know either. You would lose the image you have built of him? You would lose the good memories you had? hell yes, you might, but if you were wrong you would have so much more to gain.right?
I would rather know that he doesn’t want me anymore, than live with good memories. Do I make sense here?
Talking about Myazaki, his last movie (Howl's moving castle) was even better than spirited away! I just loved it.

1:18 AM  
Blogger Laila K said...

guys..thanks for the advice..but he just simply crossed my mind, nothing more! really, i swear! plus, i told you i'm in love, with marie-eve, my massotherapist, and i'm seeing her tomorrow, so please respect that! :)

1:22 AM  
Blogger Dry Gin Martini said...

Hmm... I think my cousin Layyoul is tough enough that if she wants to call this guy, she would. I've seen how forward she can be, she's cool like dat. Besides, she seems eager to join the other team for a while... that would be so much more exciting if we weren't related!

1:30 AM  
Blogger Dry Gin Martini said...

oh and to Paul, sorry Laila I don't want to be a troll here, but I have to disagree with Paul about Howl's Moving Castle. I just hated it. I thought the main character was the least interesting of any animes I have seen in a long while, and definitely not as cool as Spirited Away.

1:52 AM  
Blogger rouba said...

speaking of your massotherapist Laila with an a, i confess i have the same relationship with my therahairdresspist -
Not that there's anything wrong with it! :)

and yes, Spirited Away was better than Howl but frankly i don't see all the fuss about Miyazake

2:06 AM  
Blogger Dry Gin Martini said...

The fuss about Miyazaki is that he is considered an innovator in animation. He's been around for a long time and his style of animation was very unique. You can notice that in his animations people had more rounded features than the angular traditional animes, and his main characters are traditionally strong younger persons. The villains almost always have redeeming qualities that make you like them, and there's some sort of a central moral or philosphical theme to his work. My favorite of his will always be Future Boy Conan, better know to us Lebs as 3adnan Wa Lina!

2:16 AM  
Blogger Fouad said...

have you told me who he was?

12:28 PM  

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